~sigh~

I'm here, at work, on my 15 minute break. I can't take her off my head. I wonder if she thinks of me too? And if she does, is it with revulsion, admiration, wariness? I don't know...

Yesterday was a very typical day of what I would expect from her as best friends. We spent the whole day together, having fun and smiling. Except for the event at the beach, which was a bit more than friends, it was all perfect.

But she says that I suffocate her sometimes. If she wanted to be with me as much as me with her, she wouldn't feel that way. So I should be careful I don't mess up again. Maybe I should distance myself again?

I need too much attention. Or, actually, I think it might be the opposite. I want to give her all the attention in the world. But she doesn't want it all, just a bit, it seems, or only sometimes. She doesn't want to be the center of my world...

That's odd. I thought girls liked that...

~sighs, slumping~ I don't know. I can tell she still struggles to say things, but she does, a lot more than before. It saddens her that I'm sad, and that's a good sign. Shows she cares and worries about me. But I don't know...